Life's Painful Lessons

That's it, I am officially done...

No more wondering, no more restless nights, no more thinking about the what ifs, and no more hoping. I had thought that "This is it, he's the one"..... But oh boy, was I wrong. Again. How could something so right be so wrong? But then again, there's no one else to blame but me for being so gullible and trusting. Should've learned from past mistakes, need to be more ruthless now. Whoa, behold the female hulk!

I'M DONE. With everything that is related to the matters of the heart. No more, not anymore. Enough is enough. There's only so many times a person can take it, and as mine is as fragile as it is, I'd better withdraw from all this before it is shattered into pieces yet again. Okay, heart, I'm gonna take good care of you from now on, so please please please drum that happy beat of yours that I've missed for so long now.....

No, I am not giving up. But at the same time, I'm done hoping either. It is what it is, and life goes on. I need to be the captain of my own lifeboat if don't want it to be lost at sea ever again. Even if there's an emptiness inside that longs to belong to someone and that someone belongs to me, and even if the biological ticking is so loud that it is deafening, never again would I go through all this unless it's gonna be really worth it. Hmmm...looks like it's gonna be a long dreary summer.....

"Stronger"

I'll make it through the rainy days

I'll be the one who stands here longer than the rest

When my landscape changes, rearranges

I'll be stronger than i've ever been

No more stillness, more sunlight,

Everything's gonna be alright

I know that there's gonna be a change

Better find your way out of your fear

If you wanna come with me

Then that's the way it's gotta be

I'm all alone and finally

I'm getting stronger

You'll come to see

Just what I can be

I'm getting stronger

Sometimes I feel so down and out

Like emotion that's been captured in a maze

I had my ups and downs

Trials and tribulations,

I overcome it day by day,

Feeling good and almost powerful

A new me, that's what i'm looking for

I didn't know what I had to do

I just knew I was alone

People around me

But they didn't care

So I searched into my soul

I'm not the type of girl that will let them see her cry

It's not my style

I get by

See i'm gonna do this for me

-Sugababes-